


Children Behave (That's What They Say When We're Together)

by Oddree13



Series: Kliego Week 2020 [2]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Jealousy, M/M, Non-Binary Klaus Hargreeves, Pre-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Pseudo-Incest, Teen Romance, Teenagers, no beta we die like ben
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 06:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27209650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oddree13/pseuds/Oddree13
Summary: Sir is on a three-day business trip. Sure they’ve been left a training schedule, but when even Luther is convinced to not follow it (by a plea from Allison for some alone time) everyone begins plotting their adventure.“I say we go to the Mall. You remember the one we were sent to a few months ago on that mission to stop the Russian operatives using it as a hideout? Let’s go there and actually enjoy it! Food, clothes, other teenagers,” he lists, thinking of what else could entice his brothers. “Ben, they even have a bookstore,” he sings, and when Ben looks intrigued by the prospect he knows he’s won.
Relationships: Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves/Klaus Hargreeves
Series: Kliego Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1985090
Comments: 3
Kudos: 48
Collections: Kliego Week 2020





	Children Behave (That's What They Say When We're Together)

**Author's Note:**

> For the Kliego Week Prompt - Teen!Kliego
> 
> Technically set in my "Love You So Bad Verse" but no need to read that before reading this!

Sir is on a three-day business trip. 

Sure they’ve been left a training schedule, but when even Luther is convinced to not follow it (by a plea from Allison for some alone time) everyone begins plotting their adventure. 

“I want to leave the house, that much I know. Maybe we can go back to the Donut shop?” Diego suggests, laying on Ben’s bed, tossing a knife in his hands. 

“Why don’t we just stay here and do something?” Ben counters, still nervous about the idea. He only ever leaves the house on missions, his anxiety about the creature living inside of him stopping him from joining Klaus and Diego’s prior breakouts.

“No, I am not throwing away three days of Sir-free time to stay in this prison,” Klaus declares, rolling a joint for later. “I say we go to the Mall. You remember the one we were sent to a few months ago on that mission to stop the Russian operatives using it as a hideout? Let’s go there and actually enjoy it! Food, clothes, other teenagers,” he lists, thinking of what else could entice his brothers. “Ben, they even have a bookstore,” he sings, and when Ben looks intrigued by the prospect he knows he’s won. 

***

They leave after breakfast, clambering out onto the fire escape once they’re certain no one will suspect them missing and run full speed to the bus stop five blocks down from the Academy. 

“Do you think we look like other teenagers?” Diego asks, unused to the feeling of jeans. 

“That we most certainly do! I swiped one of those magazines from Allison and made sure we looked like the boys in it. Besides, we can always get something at the mall,” Klaus smirks and pulls out the wad of twenties from his back pocket. 

“Where did you get that?” Ben gasps, taking the bills Klaus is handing to him. 

“Sir keeps random cash around the house so I asked one of the nanny ghosts to scope out a stash for me,” he crows, causing Diego to tsk while taking the offered bills. 

The bus pulls up and the trio board, taking seats towards the back. The ride takes about thirty minutes, and soon enough they are stepping off across the street from the mall. 

Ben is the one who runs forward first, recognizing the bookstore flagship on the corner. Diego and Klaus follow behind him, grinning, always amused by what gets their brother excited. 

“So what do you want to do?” Diego asks as they drag Ben out of the bookstore with the promise to come back again before they go home, taking in the scene of people and shops, a little overwhelmed by choice. 

“I want to get something to wear that isn’t this,” Klaus gestures to his simple jeans and t-shirt combination. When Diego and Ben don’t answer him, he looks up and sees a group of girls leaning against the fountain, waving at his brothers. 

“Let’s go Romeos,” Klaus sighs, and pushes his brother towards the shops and away from the girls. 

“Hey what’d you do that for?” Diego grouses, while Ben blushes furiously. 

“I saved you both from making idiots of yourselves. Besides you need to help me pick out some outfits so Alli will stop complaining I’m stealing hers!”

“Fine, but who says I’d make an idiot of myself? Maybe after we get you something to wear you can help me talk to them? You’re good at talking to people.”

“That I am, but why do you want to talk to them anyway? It’s not like you can tell them who you are or go out with them?” Klaus grumbles, ignoring the smirk from Ben.

“Well, why do you talk to boys when we sneak out of the house?” Diego counters, stepping into the shop Klaus leads them into. 

“Because boys are easy. They don’t care about going on dates or romance or anything like that. They just want to make out and get off. Stuff that can be accomplished in a few hours,” he explains as he walks over to a rack of dresses, pulling off a few options. 

“But you're a boy and you like romance? I know because you’re always doing those stupid magazine quizzes with Allison and Vanya,” Ben argues, happy to have someone on his side against Klaus for once.

“Well I’m not exactly a boy now am I? I prefer to think of myself as an experience,” Klaus boasts and starts to walk over to the changing room, pushing Diego into a seat in front of the entrance. 

“Sit there, I’m going to need opinions,” Klaus demands and walks into the stall. The first dress Klaus throws on doesn’t even merit stepping out of the dressing room, and the second one - a green a-line, has both Ben and Diego shaking their heads. 

The third option, a daisy-printed skater dress, has Diego a little stunned, but before he can say anything a store attendant calls out, “You can’t be trying that on.” 

Klaus is about to open his mouth to respond when both Ben and Diego turn around. “Why not? We have money, so it’s not like we aren’t going to buy something,” Diego argues, Ben nodding in agreement

The clerk turns his sights on Diego and just rolls his eyes. “Not the point. Just get changed and get out before I have to call security.”

Diego opens his mouth to respond again when Klaus interrupts him. “Diego, just ignore it, I’ll get dressed and we can go.” 

“No, this is dumb. Why can’t he try on what he wants?” he asks again, his fingers fidgeting, wanting to reach for one of the knives tucked away in his pocket. 

“Store policy, now get out,” the man warns again, and Diego makes to stand up, but Ben settles a hand on Diego’s shoulder, and points to Klaus who is starting to cave in on himself. 

“Fine,” Diego spits and moves to stand in front of the door, guarding his brother in case the clerk gets too forceful. 

Soon the door opens and Klaus slinks out of the store, eyes downcast. But as soon as he’s out of sight of the store, he turns to his brothers, and with a grin pulls the dress out of his bag. “Well if they won’t let me buy the dress, I figured I should take it!” he beams, making his brothers left. 

“How about we go to the bathroom and you can change?” Diego encourages, pointing to the signs for the restroom. 

“I mean, this is more a house outfit, and it’s not exactly complete” Klaus side-steps, but Diego just shakes his head. 

“No it looks really nice on you,” Diego encourages, while Ben asks what else Klaus needs to make it an outfit.

“Leggings? I mean I have boots on but I can make it work. Hopefully, the makeup store doesn’t kick me out too. Alli keeps getting mad that I’m stealing hers.”

“Well then let’s go get you leggings and then you can change!” Ben decides, and before anyone can protest they go to another store across the mall, paying this time for leggings. 

By lunch Klaus is dressed in his new outfit, along with Diego and Ben who bought clothes to slide Klaus’ leggings and new hat into their basket, aiming to stop anymore purchase questions. 

As they eat in the food court, the same girls pass by them again, waving at Diego and Ben with shy giggles. 

“Do you want me to help you two talk to them?” Klaus asks, and Diego shakes his head. 

“Nah. It’s a day for us,” Ben decides. “Besides, if we finish soon we can see that new Batman movie we know Diego wants to see,” he teases. 

***

They climb back on the bus in the late afternoon, their bags filled with all the contraband they could buy. Ben dives into a comic as the bus crosses the town, leaving Diego and Klaus to talk. 

“Hey I got you something,” Diego remembers, pulling out the tube of lipstick from his pocket.

Klaus takes the cylinder and recognizes it as the expensive tube he put back after seeing the price. “How did you get this? I didn’t think you had any money left after you bought those sneakers?”

“Well you wanted it and you aren’t the only one with sticky fingers,” Diego answers, hoping Klaus actually wanted the shade.

“Thank you, Gogo!” Klaus bubbles, immediately opening the tube to apply the color using the bus window as a mirror, before pressing a pink-red kiss to Diego’s cheek. 

“You’re w-w-welcome Klaus.” 

**Author's Note:**

> In my other story, Klaus is telling someone how he and Diego "met" and I wanted to make a one-shot of it. Here's the excerpt --> "Right, well Diego and I were actually raised in the same foster home. Not exactly a conducive system for growing up, but this one here,” they crow, patting Diego’s knee, “this one always made sure I was alright. Stopped the other kids from bullying me, cleaned up my scrapes, taught me how to fight, and even stole me my first tube of lipstick!”


End file.
